How To Get a Guy To Ask You Out: Becoming Irresistible

Doublelist Team

December 4, 2023 13 minutes read
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Due to the rise in online dating, fewer men are asking people out in person. Fear of rejection is prevalent in all our minds. It’s essential to give men casual hints that you’re into them. If you’re wondering how to get a guy to ask you out, it’s easier than you think. It’s all about excluding confidence and letting them know you find them attractive. 

In this DoubleList guide, we’ll go through how to give guys the confidence to ask you out in person. Whether they’re friends, strangers, or someone you met online, our tips will get you to the next relationship stage. 


How To Be Irresistible to Guys

Being attractive to men is not about possessing specific physical attributes or adhering to strict rules. Instead, it’s about embracing your unique qualities and exuding confidence and positivity. When searching for how to get a guy to ask you out, you should start by nurturing your self-assurance. Confidence is undeniably appealing, so focus on taking care of yourself, loving yourself, and growing personally. Be sincere and genuine because authenticity is a magnet for those seeking meaningful connections. 

Show genuine interest in others and actively listen when they speak. Engage in conversations with enthusiasm and be an effective communicator. Maintain a positive outlook and a sense of humor; laughter can break down barriers and foster strong bonds. Lastly, prioritize both your physical and emotional well-being since self-assured individuals who prioritize self-care are naturally captivating. Remember that being irresistible does not require changing who you are. It simply involves embracing the best version of yourself and allowing your inner light to shine brightly.

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Why Are Guys Not Asking You Out?

There could be various reasons why guys might not be asking you out. It’s important to remember that these reasons depend on each individual and situation. Firstly, they may not be aware of your interests or intentions, so consider if your signals are clear enough. Shyness or fear of rejection can also hold some guys back from making a move. They might be uncertain about your feelings or may have experienced past rejections that make them cautious. 

Personal circumstances like a busy schedule, career focus, or personal growth could be why someone isn’t making a move. It’s essential not to take it personally and to continue being open to meeting new people. The right person will come along when the time is right. Communication and mutual understanding are key in such situations. Fostering open and honest conversations can help bridge any gaps in understanding.

How To Be More Confident Around Men

To build confidence when interacting with your favorite type of man, it’s important to start with accepting and loving yourself. Begin by recognizing your value, embracing what makes you unique, and understanding that you deserve respect and attention. Engage in positive self-talk and challenge any negative beliefs undermining your confidence.

To increase your confidence, focus on taking care of yourself both physically and mentally. Establish a self-care routine that includes activities like exercising, grooming, and choosing clothing that makes you feel comfortable and attractive. Pursue hobbies and interests that boost your self-esteem because being passionate about something can make you more interesting and self-assured.

When conversing with men, practice active listening by giving them your full attention and maintaining eye contact. Remember that men are just individuals who also have their own insecurities and vulnerabilities. Treat them as equals rather than putting them on a pedestal.

It’s important to face your fears gradually by exposing yourself to social situations involving men. Taking small steps over time can help you build confidence and feel more at ease around them. Confidence is attractive, so always believe in yourself and recognize your worth.

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How Do You Get a Guy To Ask You Out Who’s Rejected You in the Past

Have you ever had a rejection from a guy in the past but still want to give it another shot? Don’t worry! It may seem challenging, but it’s definitely not impossible. 

So, are you wondering ‘how to get a guy to ask you out who wasn’t into you before? Try these tips:

Reflect on the Past

Take some time to think about why he rejected you initially. Was there a specific reason, like bad timing or a misunderstanding, or maybe he didn’t show interest at that moment? Understanding the reasons behind the rejection can help you approach the situation more clearly.

2. Focus On Self-Improvement

Instead of changing who you are, focus on personal growth and becoming the best version of yourself. Work on building your confidence, enhancing your communication skills, and pursuing your own goals and aspirations. Being the person you want to be will make a difference regardless of whether he asks you out or not.

3. Reestablish Contact

If you haven’t been in touch with him for a while, consider reaching out in a friendly and non-intrusive manner. Start with casual conversations to catch up with each other’s lives.

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4. Be a Good Friend

Show genuine interest in him as an individual and be there for him as a supportive friend. This could mean cheering him on in his endeavors or lending an empathetic ear when needed. Be available for conversations when he wants someone to talk to.

5. Flirt in a Subtle Manner

After reconnecting and establishing a friendly rapport, start incorporating gentle flirting. Use body language, compliments, and playful teasing to express your continued interest subtly.

6. Be Prepared for the Possibility of Another Rejection

Understand that there is a chance he might reject you again, and be ready to handle it gracefully. Receiving rejection can be challenging, but respecting his feelings and decisions is essential.

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How To Get a Shy Guy To Ask You Out

If you’re wondering how to get a shy guy to ask you out, handling the situation delicately is important. Here are some tips to help make him feel more comfortable and confident enough to take that step.

1. Build a Connection

Take the time to really get to know him and establish a strong bond. Engage in meaningful conversations and discover shared interests. Show genuine interest in his thoughts and emotions, being an attentive listener.

2. Initiate Conversations

Don’t hesitate to start conversations or suggest activities. Propose casual outings, group gatherings, or events that both of you might enjoy. This can alleviate any pressure he may feel about making the first move.

3. Offer Compliments

Boost his self-assurance by providing sincere compliments about his personality, appearance, or achievements. Ensure your genuine and specific compliments show that you genuinely appreciate him.

4. Be Patient

Shy guys often need more time to gather the courage necessary to ask someone out. Give him space and let him become comfortable in your presence at his own pace.

5. Express Interest

Let him know you’re interested in spending time together beyond your current interactions. Mention that you’d love to go on a date or engage in a specific activity together. If you feel comfortable, make it simpler for him to ask you out by giving him a clear opportunity. 

For instance, you could say something like, “I really enjoy our conversations. Maybe we could grab a cup of coffee or catch a movie together sometime.”

6. Organize a Group Meetup

Consider organizing group activities or events with your mutual friends. Being in a group setting can help alleviate the pressure of one-on-one interactions.

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How To Get a Guy Friend To Ask You Out

Transitioning from friendship to a romantic relationship can be quite tricky. There’s no guarantee that he will feel the same way about you. However, following these steps and being open in your communication can improve your chances. 

Let’s explore how to get a guy friend to ask you out and turn your relationship into more. 

1. Nurture an Emotional Connection

Continue building on the emotional bond you share with him. Share your thoughts, feelings, and experiences with each other and encourage him to do the same. A strong emotional connection is crucial for a successful romantic relationship.

2. Flirt Lightly

Start incorporating playful flirting into your interactions. This could include gentle teasing, sincere compliments, and body language that subtly shows interest. Remember to keep it in line with the existing dynamics of your friendship.

3. Spend Quality Time Together

Plan activities where you can spend quality time alone together. It could be something like going to a movie or having a nice dinner together. Try going for walks or engaging in hobbies or interests you both enjoy. The idea is to create opportunities for deeper connections between both of you.

4. Drop Subtle Hints

Give subtle indications that you want to explore a romantic relationship without directly confessing your feelings. You can mention how much you enjoy spending time with him or casually talk about dating and relationships in general.

5. Create a Comfortable Atmosphere

Ensure that your interactions are comfortable and relaxing for both of you. Show your friendliness and openness by being approachable, making eye contact, and using positive body language.

If you sense that he might have similar feelings, consider having an honest conversation. Express your interest in exploring a romantic relationship and ask if he feels the same way. 

How To Get a Guy Online To Ask You Out

When asking how to get a guy online to ask you out, you need to take cautious steps. This ensures your safety and their genuine interest. Here are some tips that encourage him to take control.

1. Establish a Genuine Connection

Take the time to get to know each other better genuinely. Engage in meaningful conversations, share your interests, and ask questions that allow you to learn more about each other’s lives.

2. Be Authentic and Honest

Always be yourself and maintain honesty throughout your conversations. Being genuine is attractive and sets a strong foundation for any potential relationship.

3. Express Your Interest 

Subtly drop hints that indicate your openness to meeting in person. For instance, casually mention how much you enjoy trying new restaurants or express your curiosity about exploring a particular hobby.

4. Propose Shared Activities

Discover shared interests and suggest activities related to them. For example, if both of you have an affinity for hiking, you could say something like, “It would be great if we could go hiking together sometime.”

5. Take Initiative

Don’t hesitate to take the lead if there’s a mutual connection and you feel comfortable doing so. You could express your enjoyment of your conversations by saying something like, “I’ve truly been enjoying our chats.” Would you like to grab a coffee together sometime?”

6. Take Your Time

Some individuals may prefer to take their time before meeting face-to-face, especially if they are cautious about online dating. It’s important to be patient and respect their pace.

7. Consider Using Video Calls

Think about transitioning from text-based conversations to video calls. Video calls can help establish trust and improve the idea of meeting in person.


How To Get a Guy To Ask You Out Again

Have you been on a date and want to learn how to get a guy to ask you out again? Take these steps to encourage him to make the next move:

1. Express Your Interest

Make sure he knows that you enjoyed your time together and that you’d like to see him again. A simple “I had a great time, and I’d love to do this again” can go a long way.

2. Send a Thank-You Message

After the date, send a thank-you message expressing your appreciation for the date and the enjoyable time you had. This shows gratitude and interest in a second date.

3. Be Responsive

When he reaches out or continues to engage in conversation, be responsive and maintain the connection. Show genuine interest in his life and activities.

4. Initiate Conversations

Don’t hesitate to initiate conversations or suggest activities you both might enjoy. This can demonstrate your enthusiasm for spending more time together.

5. Be Flirtatious

Add a touch of playfulness and flirtation to your interactions. Compliments and light teasing can help create a romantic vibe.

6. Use Social Media Strategically

If you’re both on social media, like or comment on his posts or share interesting content that he’s into. Ensure you both follow each other so he can see your activity and keep you in his thoughts.

7. Suggest Specific Plans

If you’re comfortable, suggest specific plans for a second date. For example, you could say, “I heard about this new art exhibit downtown. Do you want to check it out with me this weekend?”

How To Get a Popular Guy To Ask You Out

Getting a popular guy to ask you out can be a bit challenging, but it’s certainly possible. You can encourage him to make a move even if he’s busy with friends or not in your social circles. Try these tips to build sexual tension: 

1. Build Confidence

Confidence is attractive, and it’s essential when trying to catch the attention of someone popular. Work on building your self-esteem and feeling good about yourself.

2. Be Yourself

Authenticity is key. Don’t try to be someone you’re not just to impress him. Be genuine, and let your true personality shine.

3. Maintain Confidence in Group Settings

Cute people often spend time in social groups. When you’re in a group setting, maintain your confidence and engage in group conversations. Don’t be overly clingy or possessive.

4. Be Positive and Fun

Maintain a positive attitude and be a fun person to be around. People naturally like others which make them feel special. 

5. Respect His Boundaries

Respect his personal space and boundaries. Don’t be pushy or invasive; allow him to come to you at his own pace.

6. Look Your Best

Take care of your appearance. While looks aren’t everything, taking pride in your appearance can boost your confidence and make a good impression.

7. Be Patient

Building a connection with someone, especially someone popular, can take time. Be patient, and don’t rush the process. Distance yourself from time to time to let them process their feelings towards you. 

8. Express Your Interest

If you feel a connection is developing, don’t be afraid to express your interest in a subtle way. You can say something like, “I’ve really enjoyed our time together. Would you like to grab a coffee or go see a movie sometime?”

9. Be Prepared for Any Outcome

Be prepared for the possibility that he may not ask you out. Sometimes, people have different interests or may not be ready for a healthy relationship.

Find a Man Online With DoubleList

If you’re wondering ‘how to get a guy to ask you out,’ then you’re probably single. Rather than waiting for the right man to come along, try searching him out on DoubleList. Our personal ads platform lets you post in various categories, including ‘muscular,’ ‘personals,’ and ‘bondage.’ Find a guy to ask you out in over 248 cities by signing up to DoubleList here.

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