A Tumultuous Journey of Dating Adventures

My first ever going in blind what am I fucking doing doublelist hook up.
I'll be Tina, but I am 38, work out body, tight boobs and my ass is noticeably big for my body. Not a big fat ass, but I know what I'm packing.
Me and my husband Dale had a tumultuous 10 years that finally ended. I began to do the Match, dabbled in Tinder and found DL last New Year's Night.
I did a few dates from Match and had an open mind, if I was feeling it and if there is a mutual interest, I'd fuck on first date.
It was painful to see these men try to not brag, talk about an ex/mom or turn conversation toward sex. One guy stood a chance, handsome, noticeable bulge hanging to right and I watched women notice as we walked arm and arm along the Riverwalk. Then he kissed me at car before drive home. I can't describe to you how bad the kiss was. He came in mouth wide open, my pussy dried up in parking lot. Home, he turns into a dick because no kiss or pussy. Amatuer Porn small vibrator, my phone exploding with angry texts, I'm delaying my orgasm reading his texts. Finally, " Your mother should have showed you how to kiss and your behavior right now shows me all I need to know."
Now nervously I read Doublist posts, bi guys or supposed straight guys that," can eat your pussy better than anyone." I went months just talking, but they werent shy about sending cock pics, Hairy curved little nub buried in a bush? Ugh. Some tried being charming, but nothing jumped out at me. Then Jeffery, a long thought provoking reply that felt honest. He was married and the sex ended few years ago. He, " not looking to fuck your pussy, so to speak. Just miss the heat, the body contact, taste." I understood him, there are so many nuances you forget about as your jabbing a vibrator in your pussy watching an amatuer wife take her first black cock.
He said it was easy for him to get out and could come over at any time. I was nervous, but did something for the first time, sent him a Pic of my breasts with " show me" message. He didn't reply for a long time as I got sick with nerves. He sent a Pic standing in shower, cock not fully erect but obviously stimulated hanging down his thigh, biceps, holy fuck! Then I sent full body nudes, ass, it was exciting! I told him a time, Showered shaved, shaved again. Lit candles,set up the living room to play in. Almost sick with nerves, lingerie but didnt over do it.Just panties with sheer short robe. I imagined this love making beautiful scene in my head. He's gentle... within Minutes of coming through my door he was sitting on the couch holding my head tight making a cock fit in my throat that didnt until him. I was scared, he pumped my face with all of it, my drool was covering my tits, giving me a break, but only to shine my tits, pinch my nipples until they would explode, then he kissed me, biting my bottom lip, its what set us in motion, he bit sucked, tongue so perfectly, I was all in as I dropped down forcing his cock down my throat, hand holding my head 20-30 seconds is a long time not to breath! He had me stand and drape myself over the arm of the couch, spanking wasn't hard enough! But didn't argue as he spread me getting his tongue on my brown hole. Never felt that! Then thumb in my ass cock pounding my pussy, I was thrashing about, screaming, he called me his whore and we finished just like that. I lay there as he got ready to leave. He leaned over me as I lay on couch, kiss goodbye turned into him fingerbanging me until I squirt..no not first time..but after that I didnt remember him leave. We did hook up quite a bit,but when schedules got messed up on purpose by me. I thought he'd like to walk in and see another guy with me and join in. His last words were " bye Tina" as I took a cock from behind. I tried apologizing, " Thought it was whimsical." He never forgave me, oh he fucks me, but a dark side of Jeffery has come out, no forgiveness for me, just servitude.