Sex Advice for Men: How To Be a Better in Bed

Doublelist Team

September 15, 2023 11 minutes read
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Let’s be honest, gents. We’ve all had those moments in the bedroom where we’ve thought, “Could I be doing this better?” And the vast world of the internet is overflowing with sex advice for men (some questionable at best). So, it’s high time we broke things down. No fluff, no overcomplicated jargon, just the real deal on how to step up your bedroom game. 

After all, being a memorable lover isn’t about fancy techniques; it’s about genuine connection, a dash of finesse, and a sprinkle of fun.

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Best Sex Advice For Men: Communication

Let’s kick things off with a truth bomb: chatting isn’t just for post-date recaps or figuring out dinner plans. It’s the best sex advice for men in the bedroom, too. You wouldn’t dive into a pool blindfolded, right? The same rule applies here. Get to know your partner’s likes, dislikes, and those “maybe-we-could-try” areas.

Communication will improve your sex life. It’s how you tune into each other’s frequency. It’s not about breaking the mood with a questionnaire. It’s subtle. A look, a whisper, a gentle check-in. Because when words meet action, that’s where the magic happens. Trust us, your partner will appreciate the effort. And hey, you might discover something new.

Educate Yourself

Are you jumping onto the intimacy highway without a roadmap? Not the best idea. We’ve got news for you: the learning doesn’t stop after those awkward teenage years. 

By educating yourself, you’re leveling up your skills and showing your partner you care. And let’s be honest, leading initiative? It’s pretty darn sexy. So, gents, grab that book, click on that seminar, and dive into the knowledge pool. Your bedroom adventures will thank you.

Sex Advice for Men: Books and Literature

Have you heard the saying, “Knowledge lies between the pages”? Well, that holds true for the bedroom, too. There are books penned by experts, therapists, and those who’ve walked the walk.

They’re not just how-tos or position guides (though there’s a place for those). They touch on intimacy, connection, and the nuances of male sexuality. Titles like “She Comes First” by Ian Kerner or “The Guide to Getting It On” by Paul Joannides offer deep dives with a sprinkle of humor. These aren’t your run-of-the-mill romance novels. They’re textbooks filled with sex advice for men.

So swap out that thriller for something steamier next time you browse at the bookstore or scroll through an online shop. It’s a win-win and is for the mind and the bed.

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Sex Advice for Men: Websites

The digital age is a blessing, especially when searching for bedroom wisdom. Websites are today’s quick, discreet, and have an incredibly vast knowledge of sexual activity. Are you hunting for the latest techniques of consumatory pleasure? There’s a site for that. Need to debunk a myth? A quick search has your back. 

Websites like Scarleteen, OMGYes, DoubleList and Sex & Psychology dish out advice backed by professionals, real-world experiences, and, sometimes, a touch of science. Dive into articles, interactive guides, and even quizzes to gauge where you stand. And, let’s be honest: we’re all glued to our screens anyway. Why not mix some pleasure with the usual scroll? Just remember to vet your sources. Not all info out there is gold. But with discernment, the web can be your best friend in intimate growth.

Foreplay: More Than Just an Appetizer

Gentlemen, let’s chat about foreplay. You would only chow down on the main course with savoring the starters, right? The same principle applies to the bedroom. Foreplay isn’t just a prelude; it’s an art in its own right. Think of it as the rhythm before the crescendo. It sets the mood, builds the tension, and trust us, it’s the difference between “that was nice” and “let’s do that again.” Touch, tease, whisper, explore because foreplay is where intimacy thrives.

So, before diving into the deep end, take this sex advice for men and remember to enjoy the shallows. Because sometimes, the journey is as rewarding as the destination.

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Sex Advice for Men: Slow Down and Enjoy

The modern world’s all about speed. Fast cars, quick bites, instant messages. But here’s a curveball: Regarding the bedroom, slower often means better. It’s not a race to the finish line. It’s about savoring each sensation, each touch, every whispered word. 

Taking your time heightens anticipation, magnifies every sensation, and deepens connection. Feel the rhythm, read the signs, and let the moment dictate the pace. And here’s a little secret: patience and restraint? They can be the most potent tools in your intimate arsenal. So next time, hit the brakes a bit. Dive deep into the moment. Because true female pleasure, often, is in the details.

Sex Advice for Men: Tools and Toys

Let’s shift gears and chat about those fun little accessories: tools and toys. Now, before you raise an eyebrow, hear us out. The bedroom scene has evolved, and toys aren’t just for solo sessions or exclusive to one gender. They’re like the spicy condiments of intimacy – elevating and enhancing the main dish.

From vibrators to rings and even couples’ toys, there’s something for everyone. And the benefits? Oh boy. Toys can introduce new sensations, prolong pleasure, and sometimes bridge the gap between fantasy and reality. They’re also excellent for learning – about yourself and your partner. The trick? Open-mindedness and communication. Choose something both of you are curious about. Remember, it’s not about replacing but enhancing.

Next time you’re feeling adventurous, take a stroll down the online aisle of a reputable toy store. It may be the zing your repertoire needs. If you’re new to sex toys, check out our blog on the best sex toys for beginners.

Sexy Halloween Costume Ideas for Men 5

Building Stamina

Here’s some sex advice for men: stamina isn’t just for marathon runners or gym buffs. In the world of intimacy, it’s like that secret sauce that makes everything sizzle a bit more. But what is stamina? It’s not just lasting longer. It’s about maintaining energy, being present, and syncing with your partner’s rhythm.

Now, the age-old myth? Men should be natural pros at this. You cultivate stamina; it’s not just a gift. Whether practicing specific exercises or tapping into mind control techniques, there’s a path to building and boosting stamina. Because, in the end, intimacy is a dance, and who doesn’t want to enjoy every beat without losing breath?

Sex Advice for Men: Exercises To Boost Stamina

We often associate stamina-building with grueling gym routines. But boosting stamina for the bedroom can be as straightforward as incorporating specific exercises into your daily routine. Here are some ways to boost your stamina:

  • Pelvic Floor Exercises: You’ve probably heard of them for women, but gents, these are for you, too. Strong pelvic muscles will lead to better control and endurance. Think of it as a subtle clench and release.

  • Cardio: Regular aerobic exercise, be it jogging, swimming, or even brisk walking, increases blood flow and heart health. It also leads to erectile strength.

  • Interval Training: Short bursts of high-intensity exercises followed by rest periods. It mirrors the ebbs and flows of intimacy, training your body to recover and recharge swiftly.

  • Yoga: Beyond flexibility, yoga sharpens mind-body connection and control. Plus, those deep breaths? They help in maintaining energy levels.

  • Basic Strength Training: Building core strength supports better posture and vigor. It’s not about bulking up but toning and fortifying.

Gents, remember, this sex advice for men isn’t about becoming a fitness fanatic. It’s about consistent, intentional moves to enhance your intimate moments.

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Sex Advice for Men: Control Techniques

Control. It’s not about dominance or power plays. Getting through intimacy issues is about understanding, pacing, and harmony with your partner. And, while some of this comes naturally, a little skill polishing never hurt anyone. Here are some of the best techniques to control your orgasm:

  • The Stop-Start Technique: Just as it sounds. Engage, pause when things feel intense, and then start again. It’s about training your body to recognize and manage sensations.

  • Deep Breathing: Think of this as your anchor. Slow, deep breaths can reduce arousal spikes and keep you grounded. It’s mindfulness, bedroom style.

  • The Squeeze: Right before you feel you’re reaching the peak, gently squeeze the end of the shaft. It can act as a mini reset button, buying you more time.

  • Switch it Up: When things get heated, change positions or rhythms. It breaks the monotony and gives you a momentary breather.

  • Mindful Masturbation: Understand your body. Recognize the sensations that lead to climax. By practicing solo, you can better control responses during partnered sessions.

Lastly, gents, patience is vital. These techniques take practice and understanding. And hey, don’t shy away from discussing with your partner. Sometimes, two heads (pun intended) are better than one in navigating the waters of control.

Positional Tips and Tricks

Alright, gents, let’s talk strategy – and by that, we mean those nifty positional playbooks. While many of us might think we’ve got the basics down, there’s always room for fresh inspiration.

Sex Advice for Men: Spice up the Vanilla

Vanilla. It’s that classic flavor we’ve all savored. But while the missionary might be a tried-and-true favorite, introducing a bit of zest can elevate the entire experience. So, how do you take this sex advice for men and sprinkle in some excitement? Here are some tips to spice up the vanilla:

  • Prop and Elevate: Simple additions like pillows can surprisingly adjust angles. By elevating your partner’s hips, you change the depth and sensation.

  • Slow-Motion Play: Instead of the usual pace, try slowing things down. The increased tension and anticipation can be electrifying.

  • Eye Contact: It sounds basic, but maintaining deep eye contact can be incredibly intimate and intense. It’s all about the connection it will create.

  • Introduce a Tease: Before diving in, spend more time on extended foreplay. Prolonged teasing can intensify the eventual main event.

  • Talk It Out: Dirty talk, or even just verbalizing your desires and affirmations, can heat things up immensely.

Remember, spicing things up doesn’t mean doing acrobatics. It’s about subtle changes, experimenting with pace, depth, and communication. It’s all about finding that sweet spot between the familiar and the thrilling.

Sex Advice for Men: Try Something Adventurous

Okay, gents, let’s take things up a notch, shall we? Stepping out of the comfort zone in the bedroom can be the dash of thrill many relationships thrive on. We’re not talking about scaling the Himalayas but perhaps venturing into some uncharted territories of intimacy. Here’s how to get that adrenaline pumping:

  • Location, Location: The bedroom’s cozy, but what about the shower? Or the balcony under a blanket of stars? New settings can reignite passion.

  • Role Play: It’s not just for theater enthusiasts. Embodying different personas can provide a refreshing break from routine and spark new dynamics.

  • Introduce Blindfolds: Heightening one sense by limiting another can be exhilarating. Blindfolds intensify touch, making every sensation unpredictable.

  • Temperature Play: Some great sex advice for men is to play with temperature—for example, ice cubes on a hot day or warm oil on a chilly night. Playing with temperature contrasts can send shivers (of pleasure) down the spine.

  • Light Restraints: With mutual consent and trust, soft silk ties or handcuffs can add an element of playful power dynamics.

But a golden rule? Communication. It’s crucial to ensure both partners are on board and boundaries are set. Adventure is thrilling, but mutual respect and understanding are paramount. Ready to add a little daring twist to the mix?

Sex Advice for Men: Going Deep

Simply going through the motions isn’t enough for those seasoned in intimacy. The quest for deeper connection, new sensations, and exploring uncharted territories becomes paramount. Let’s talk more sex advice for men and discuss advanced positions:

  • Deep Dive: A twist on the traditional missionary. Elevate your partner’s legs over your shoulders. It allows for deeper penetration and increased pleasure.

  • G-Whiz: Your partner lies on their back, legs raised and resting on your chest. This angle provides deep penetration and the ability to control the rhythm.

  • Reverse Cowgirl: This position offers a unique angle and the opportunity for deep penetration. Plus, it gives the woman the reins, which can be a thrilling change-up.

  • Ballet Dancer: Stand on one foot while your partner wraps the other around your waist. It’s adventurous, requires balance, and provides a different kind of deep connection.

  • Elevated Doggy: With your partner on all fours at the edge of the bed, stand and enter from behind. Adjusting the height with pillows offers varying depths and angles.

Being experienced is about more than just knowing a lot of positions. It’s about understanding how to adapt and refine techniques for mutual satisfaction. Exploring these positions can add a new layer of depth and sensation to your intimate encounters.

Put Your New Skills to the Test on DoubleList!

After soaking in some seriously steamy sex advice for men, it’s time to implement your newfound knowledge.

Introducing DoubleList. What is DoubleList? It’s the ultimate destination for like-minded individuals seeking thrilling local casual encounters. It’s a community of passionate individuals ready to dive headfirst into the art of intimacy. Your next electrifying encounter is just a click away. Sign up now and ignite the spark to set your intimate adventures ablaze!

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