Kink vs. Fetish: Wait, There’s a Difference?

Doublelist Team

May 18, 2023 9 minutes read
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Kinks and fetishes are becoming more popular in mainstream media (think; 50 Shades of Grey. With the normalization around kinks and fetishes, more people are open to exploring their sexuality.  But kink vs. fetish is still in question for many – Aren’t they the same thing?

You may be surprised to hear that there’s a subtle but distinct difference between the two.

Kinks and fetishes are fantastic for adding some heat to the bedroom. However, before jumping in, it is best to understand their differences.

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Understanding Kink vs. Fetish

Everyone can use kinks and fetishes to spice up their sex life. It doesn’t matter if you’re a kink novice or a pro: understanding kink vs. fetish is vital!

Are you searching for ways to add more kink to your sex life or turn up the heat in the bedroom? Well, kinks and fetishes could be just what you need.

Both kinks and fetishes are similar yet very different in one aspect.

Kink vs. Fetish: What Makes Them Different?

Sexual kinks: A sexual kink is considered a sexual activity outside the social norm in the bedroom. Sexual kinks are usually things that can add some heat but you don’t require them for arousal or climax.

Those with sexual kinks may not always need or want them in the bedroom. Kinks simply increase sexual arousal and can be used as little or as often as you like.

Sexual fetish: A sexual fetish differs from a kink because it is a sexual attraction towards fetish objects, including body parts – Think foot fetish.

A person with a sexual fetish requires the fetish to be a part of sex for arousal and climax.

Going back to our foot fetish example, someone with this fetish needs feet involved one way or another for sexual arousal and climax.

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Popular Sexual Kinks – Are You as Kinky as You Think?

As mentioned earlier, kinks and fetishes are pretty different. We’ve compiled a list of the top kinks and fetishes to help you understand them in more depth.

Some people learn they have sexual kinks at an earlier age than others.

Some sexual kinks can start in early adolescence. Kinks can develop in others while searching for ways to heat their sex life.

No matter your reasoning for having a sexual kink, they are entirely normal and healthy! The most important thing to remember: nothing is sexier than consent.

Regardless of your kink vs. fetish, consent from all parties is necessary before exploring.

1. Spanking: This is one of the most common sexual kinks! Spanking involves one or both parties enjoying spanking.

Spanking can take place with light or heavy spanks. Areas like the butt, boobs, and inner thighs are popular spanking areas.

Many people simply resort to spanking with their hands in the heat of the moment.

2. BDSM  Bondage, discipline, sadism, and masochism. BDSM is better known thanks to its portrayal in modern movies.

In short, BDSM is the term used to describe sexual relationships where dominance and submission are typical.

3. Praise/degradation: Praise kinks and degradation kinks are opposites. Praise kinks are when one party enjoys receiving praise from their partner, and the partner enjoys praising.

Using terms like ‘good girl’ and ‘good boy’ can arouse someone with a praise kink.

In comparison, a degradation kink is the opposite. One party may enjoy hearing derogatory names, and the other enjoys degrading them.

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Less Common Sexual Kinks: Find Out How Kinky You Really Are

1. Pregnancy kinks: If you get aroused when looking at a pregnant woman, or the idea of a woman being pregnant turns you on, you have a kink.

2. Gagging: This sexual kink is pretty self-explanatory! A gagging kink is when you enjoy someone gagging you. Alternatively, you enjoy gagging your partner.

This can involve genitals, hands, and toys.

Popular Sexual Fetishes – Do You NEED One of These for Arousal?

If you’re trying to determine whether you have a kink vs. fetish, ask yourself one question: “Can I get aroused without this?”

If your answer is no, then you have a fetish.

Research into where sexual fetishes stem from is becoming more common. If you were wondering if you’re weird for your fetish. Research suggests it’s not a sign of mental illness; it may be the opposite!

Kink vs. Fetish: Popular Sexual Fetishes

Like kinks, some sexual fetishes are more common than others. Here are some of the most popular fetishes.

1. Quirofila: Quirofila is a hand fetish. Really when you think about it, everyone has a mild inclination toward quirofilia. Hands play a significant role in the bedroom during sex! So, developing a fetish for them isn’t all that out there.

Similarly, many enjoy the fantasy of ‘many hands at once’ on them, which can also play into quirofila.

2. Somnofilia: A person with this fetish will become aroused by a person sleeping. Dubbed ‘sleeping beauty syndrome,’ this fetish is an extensive power exchange.

Generally, one party is aroused by a person sleeping and the other by sex occurring while sleeping. The main thing to remember is that this is entirely consensual.

3. Foot fetish: Feet aren’t typically considered a sexual body part, but they are for some! Feet fetishes are also quite popular, with many sites dedicated to feet.

A person with a foot fetish will become aroused from seeing feet and having feet involved sexually. This can involve foot jobs, toe-sucking, and feet worship.

Less Common Sexual Fetishes – AKA the ‘Weirder’ Ones!

If none of the above fetishes were enough, one could turn you on more.

1. Lactofilia: Lactofilia fetishists enjoy watching a woman lactating. The lactation could occur during sex or even via videos sent to them.

2. Klismaphilia: Aroused by enemas? Then you have a klismaphilia fetish (it doesn’t quite have the same ring as the beloved ‘foot fetish’).

If you fantasize about having enemas or prepping your partner for them (or even just watching them), this is a fetish you may want to explore more.

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Kink vs Fetish: Spicing up Your Sex Life

The most important thing to remember with sex is consent. Whether you want to have regular sex, kinky sex, or fetish sex: consent is vital.

There is nothing wrong with experimenting with a kink vs. fetish in the bedroom to see which one you have.

However, sometimes it can feel like an awkward conversation with your partner! So, with that in mind, here are DoubleList’s top tips for introducing kinks and fetishes to your life.

How To Introduce Kink vs. Fetish Into Your Sex Life

If you’ve been struggling to introduce kinks and fetishes into your sex life, here’s a list of ideas that could help.

These ideas will help both you and your partner feel more at ease about bringing something new to the bedroom.

Remember to have fun!

1. Communication: Effective, open-minded communication between all parties is essential. Before either partner decides to introduce a kink or fetish to the bedroom, everyone needs to be on board.

This conversation can sometimes be awkward or uncomfortable to start. Why not try easing into it by showing your partner this article?

See if anything catches their attention naturally. Doing this can be a great icebreaker to open a more in-depth conversation.

2. Start slow: Jumping from regular sex to kinky/fetish sex can be a drastic change. So rather than jumping right into the deep end with intense BDSM or urophilia, take it slow.

Find some kinks that get both of your heart rates going. Bondage, spanking, and feet are considered more tame kinks and fetishes.

Exploring your kinky side should be a fun and exciting adventure. You can gradually increase the intensity of the kinks/fetishes over time.

This build-up in and of itself can be just as much fun as getting to the kink/fetish!

So, don’t rush the process. Be sure to gauge your partner’s reaction at each stage to ensure they’re comfortable continuing. It’s always a better experience if the communication between you and your partner is open.

3. Think learning aids: Normalising sexual kinks and fetishes can make your partner feel more at ease. There are a vast number of aids that you can use.

You can use visual aids such as online videos, smutty books or movies; the modern world is much more sex-positive nowadays.

Sometimes showing your partner your sexual kinks can make the conversation more comfortable than saying it.

Exploring Your Kink vs. Fetish

Many people wondering about a fetish vs. kink become aware of their sexual preferences early on. But sometimes, a fetish is a learned behavior or an event that leads your curiosity into developing a kink or a fetish.

People generally don’t explore fetishes as much as kinks. This is largely because kinks are a little easier to introduce to partners in the bedroom.

As a result, people may feel more confident exploring kinks than fetishes. But finding the right partner will open your world up entirely.

If everything in this article is precisely what you have been searching for: DoubleList is for you. This fun, kinky website is ideal for meeting with like-minded individuals.

Doublelist is a safe space for everyone to explore their kinky side. Whether you are looking for a casual hookup, a place to chat or education about kinks and fetishes, DoubleList has it.

There is a fast, simple and anonymous registration process on DoubleList! In addition, our site offers a free subscription service that allows users to post daily, comment on posts and arrange casual hookups.

However, if you are a bit deeper into the kinky side, DoubleList’s two paid subscription services are ideal. Starting from as little as $10-$20 per month, you could have better access to more features.

So what are you waiting for? Join DoubleList today and spice up your sex life better than ever before.

Summary – Understanding Your Kink vs. Fetish

Kinks and fetishes are no longer a secret (they shouldn’t ever have been!). Exploring your sexuality is as sexy as it gets. Being comfortable with your body and sexual partner can be heightened with kinks and fetishes.

Kinks and fetishes also offer a fantastic way to explore your body, interests, likes and dislikes. They can foster closeness and intimacy in a sexual relationship.

Similarly, kinks and fetishes can be a great way to get you comfortable with your sexuality. Really, what is there not to love?

Unlock your wildest fantasies and connect with locals today!

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