Praise Kink: When Praise Turns You on and Gets You Hot

Doublelist Team

November 25, 2022 8 minutes read
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Who doesn’t like being told they’re amazing in bed? Blushing and feeling giddy are natural responses to honeyed words when they’re whispered softly in your ear by your lover. If compliments about how you look, how you do something, or your character make you sexually excited and make sex more gratifying, then you have a praise kink. And baby, that makes you amazing.

What is “Praise kink”?

If you watch a lot of TikTok videos, it’s highly likely that you only learned what “praise kink” or “praising kink” means from this widely popular platform. What, exactly, is the definition of “praise kink”?

Here’s how sex expert and Sssh.com founder and director, Angie Rowntree, describes “praise kink”: “It involves the intentional use of praise and kind words in the context of sex or foreplay — and it’s not just what is said, but how it is said and the context. Praise kink is a kink when it is used as the focus of the interaction between partners, or is part of a power exchange dynamic. In BDSM context, the sub often receives praise from the dominant.”

We can define it simply as a love for affirmation or compliments, particularly during sexual activity. When a compliment turns you on or makes you more horny than you already are, and especially if it makes sex more satisfying for you, then you have a praise kink.

Everybody enjoys being praised about their “sexual prowess” and skills in bed, of course. So what’s the difference between simply enjoying a compliment and having a praise kink?

According to Dr. Sarah Ashton, psychologist and founder of Ships Psychology, loving praise becomes a kink when “we become sexually aroused when we hear it.

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Praise Kink Examples

As with other types of kink, fully indulging your praise kink requires a certain level of trust in your partner and security in your relationship. And because there are many ways to be praised within the sexual context, it may take some trial and error and honest communication to identify the praises that get you/your partner wet or hard and which ones bring climax.

ASTROGLIDE’s resident sexologist, Dr. Jess O’Reilly, PhD, explains that “Some people say that their praise kink is tied to the fact that praise helps them have a euphoric or intense experience. Some people want to be praised for their behavior. Others want praise related to their skill, character, appearance, role, attitude, or specific context.”

Let’s take a look at some praise kink examples that you or your partner may find extremely satisfying.

Praise Kink Phrases

Try out some of these praise kink phrases before, during, or after sex.

  1. You’re so good at [insert skill].
  2. You look so hot when you [insert activity].
  3. Your [insert body part] is irresistible.
  4. You taste so good. I can’t get enough of you.
  5. Look at you taking my _______ so well, my princess, you’re turning me on even more.
  6. Excellent job, [insert term of endearment]. Keep doing that.
  7. All day I’ve been thinking about your sweet [body part]
  8. Your [body part] drives me absolutely wild.
  9. I love the way you [do something].
  10. I can’t have enough of your big, hard ____. Give me all of it.

Praise Kink Sayings That Are Less Explicit

Praise kink is not always sexually explicit. Here are some praise kink sayings that are hot but not vulgar.

  1. You’re such a good [kitty, doll, student, daddy, baby, teacher, pet, term of endearment, sub, dom, etc.].
  2. I’m so lucky to have you. I know everyone wants a _______ just like you.
  3. I can’t wait to show you off.
  4. You look so good in that [insert item of clothing/fetish wear].
  5. Who’s my good boy/girl/person?
  6. You know I just melt when I see you wearing that.
  7. You feel so, so good.
  8. Just like that. How did you get so perfect?
  9. You’re doing amazing — I’m so proud of you.
  10. I idolize you. I worship everything you do.

cucumber + banana in tuxedos

Praise Kink Songs

If music is your preferred language and you want to explore the appeal of praise kink, you can check out this playlist of praise king songs by Pillow Princess with a Praise Kink:

  • Daddy Issues by The Neighbourhood
  • when the party’s over by Billie Eilish
  • Stargirl Interlude by The Weeknd / Lana Del Rey
  • I WANNA BE YOUR SLAVE by Måneskin
  • West Coast by Lana Del Rey
  • Brooklyn Baby by Lana Del Rey
  • Star Shopping by Lil Peep
  • Pacify Her by Melanie Martinez
  • Gimme More by Britney Spears
  • Nobody by Mitski

How to Communicate With Your Partner About Praise Kink

While everyone enjoys being praised in the bedroom, not everyone is into kinks. Satisfying your praise kink or just being curious about it may mean making yourself vulnerable. This is not an easy thing to do for many people, whether they’re in a committed relationship or just hooking up. If you need praise to get aroused or achieve climax, it’s important to discuss it early and properly. If it’s your partner who has this kink, you have to be honest with them and with yourself about whether or not you can be comfortable with it, at the very least.

Sexologist Chelsea Liley makes the following suggestions to help you broach the idea to your partner.

  • Make sure to bring it up before you even get naked.
  • Send your partner a TikTok video about praise kink and say, “Hot, right? Wanna try this later?”
  • Share this article with them and mention that you find it very interesting.
  • Ask them what kinds of compliments make them feel horny, and then share your own preferences.
  • Give it a go. Start slowly if you’re still figuring out what works for both of you; during foreplay is the best time to experiment with different praise kink phrases.

That feeling of excitement you get you hear your partner’s euphoric moans or when they say, “That feels so good!” while you’re going down on them — that’s the feeling you’re going for when you experiment with praise kink.

Things might get a bit awkward or you or your partner might feel silly the first few times you engage in praise kink, and that’s okay. Just have fun with it until you nail it. Remember that satisfying any kind of kink means feeling comfortable about your sexuality; it’s all about sexual freedom.

When Praise and Degradation Go Hand in Hand

For some people, their praise kink is intertwined with degradation kink — that is, they enjoy being both bad and good. This interchange of degradation and praise is most common within the BDSM community and specifically involves the power exchange between a dom and sub.

Chelsea Liley is very familiar with this interplay. “Sometimes people love to get degraded, you know call me a dirty little slut, call me a whore, all of those things that feel a little bit naughty and feel a little bit risque. Someone might be getting their ass whacked to the high heavens and then someone leans over and says you’re so fucking beautiful.”

ffm1

A person who enjoys both praise and degradation is referred to as a “brat” in the kink community. One such brat shares, “”So I’m on the subby side, but I make you work for it. So the degradation kind of comes into play when I’m being a brat, so they’ll talk down to me but then once I finally give over to that power struggle, I’ll be called a good girl and that I did a good job.”

There’s an entire psychology behind praise kink and degradation kink, and understanding it may help some people feel more comfortable about their kinky inclinations, especially if they’re just starting to explore them. It also always helps to be surrounded by like-minded individuals. Fortunately, there are plenty of communities out there where different people with different kinds of kink will feel right at home.

When Praise Gets You Off, Get Your Dose of Adulation on a Hookup Site

If you’re thirsting for some well-deserved praise kink, if you need to hear words of adulation to feed your sexual excitement, you’ll find immense satisfaction on a hookup site like DoubleList.

Be a good girl and create your DoubleList profile and connect with members who will absolutely adore you. Get validated as an amazing lover when you become a DoubleLister and start hooking up with men, women, gays, bis, or couples of your choice. Satisfy your craving for sexy compliments and erotic affirmation immediately after you join the DoubleList community.

Signing up for a DoubleList account is quick, free, and secure. You’ll remain anonymous, and you can choose as many sexual preferences as you like. DoubleList is available in most major cities in the U.S. so you have great odds of finding potential hookups in your area whenever you’re in the mood. Sign up for a free account now!

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