Guide To Cuckolding Fetish: Watching Never Felt So Good

Doublelist Team

April 10, 2023 11 minutes read
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Have you ever wished you could watch your partner have sex with someone else? Then it sounds like you could use a guide to cuckolding fetish. As strange as it may sound to some, this is a prevalent sexual fantasy (particularly among men). But like many kinks (especially kinks with an element of degradation), it’s taboo to talk about.

Not anymore. Today, we’re drawing back the curtain and answering all the questions you were too afraid to ask. We’re talking about the history, how cuckolding differs from other voyeuristic fetishes, and how to have cuckold relationships. We’ll even cover where to find the perfect sexual partners to get dirty. Sit back, relax, and watch. We’ll show you how to do it..

What Is a Cuckold Fetish?

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A cuckold fetish, in short, means getting off from watching your partner have sex with someone else. But before we go further into our guide to cuckolding fetish, let’s break down the phrase. That way, you can better understand this dynamic.

First, what’s a fetish? A fetish is a strong sexual desire linked to a specific object, feature, or activity. Oftentimes, the object of a fetish isn’t inherently sexual. A fetish is much more intense than being attracted to someone or something. Some people view it as an overwhelming compulsion or a complete devotion to the object of a fetish.

Now let’s discuss the first part of the “what is a cuckold fetish” question. A traditional definition is a man whose wife has sex with other men (aka, bulls). Though these days, anyone can use the label, not just men and married people. A woman could have a cuckold fetish for seeing her man with multiple female partners. The same goes for LGBTQ+ couples as well.

Additionally, modern cuckolding doesn’t always involve the cuckold sitting in the room and observing. Some cuckolds prefer to hear all the salacious details after the fact. Or to watch a recording of the encounter. Others reach sexual satisfaction by dressing and prepping their partner for their sexscapade.

Guide To Cuckolding Fetish: A Brief History of Cuckolding

At this point, you may be wondering, where did this phenomenon come from? Believe it or not, it comes from nature. No, we’re not saying there are animals out there reading their guide to cuckolding fetish. In biology, a cuckold is a male animal who parents another male’s offspring thinking it is his own. Or a cuckold is a male animal who gives up his partner to a more dominant male.

Cuckoo birds sometimes lay eggs in other nests, leading that unsuspecting bird to raise those hatchlings as their own. With deer, if a stag loses a battle to another deer, he gives up his partner to this “alpha” stag. Similarly, biologists see cuckolding in primates. Here a female mates with a male other than her partner. Her partner then still acts as a parent to the resulting offspring.

For a while, this was how the term was used with humans as well. Over time, however, the term evolved into having less to do with parenting and more with sex. Within the sexual realm, the cuckold was no longer an unwitting participant. He was the one sending out his wife to have sex with other men for his sexual gratification.

Guide To Cuckolding Fetish: Why Do People Like It

If you’re looking for a guide to cuckolding fetish, you might be wondering, why do people like this?

A lot of the appeal of cuckolding comes from an element of voyeurism and/or erotic humiliation. Some cuckolds can’t get enough of watching other people’s sexual relations. They feel like a fly on the wall, sneaking a look into something private. In a way, it’s kind of real-life porn. The cuckold can sit back and masturbate to someone else’s sex life.

Others enjoy the degradation kink element of standing by while someone else satisfies their partner. Even though cuckolding now shows up across genders and sexualities, the root comes from ideas of masculinity. The original concept is the cuckold is less manly because he lets someone else have his wife. Having to watch someone satisfy her is the ultimate form of humiliation. This same element of masochism appeals to people of all genders.

Cuckold fetishists sometimes go a step further and ask for verbal humiliation. In these scenarios, either their partner or the third person will insult, mock, or degrade the cuckold.

Not all of cuckolding comes from voyeurism and masochism. Some of it concerns genuine happiness seeing your partner with someone else. This is also known as “compersion” and is the opposite of jealousy. Some cuckolds love knowing someone satisfies their partner.

And, of course, many cuckolds enjoy all of these elements simultaneously.

Guide To Cuckolding Fetish: Cuckolding vs. Hotwifing vs. Polyamory

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Why is the history of the term important to our guide to cuckolding fetish? Because it touches on one of the most popular forms of cuckolding: a man sending his wife to sleep with someone else. In this version, the cuckold has a sense of ownership over his wife. The appeal of the fetish comes from her “cheating” on him and therefore humiliating him.

This version of the fetish centers on a power play. The man has power over the woman, but the man or “bull” she sleeps with has power over both of them. The bull is the “alpha” or superior in this context. But not everyone with a cuckold fantasy likes to approach the dynamic this way.

Another version of cuckolding involves the cuckold husband feeling a sense of pride that he has a hot wife. He wants other men to have sex with her because of that. People call this “hotwifing”. Though both cuckolding and hotwifing are similar, the latter doesn’t deal with humiliation.

Different from both cuckolding and Hotwifing is Polyamory and open relationships. For one, polyamory isn’t a fetish. In poly relationships, there isn’t an implied sense of dominance or inherent gender roles. A polyamorous or open couple involves all partners having an emotional and physical relationship with multiple people. There’s a polyamorous hierarchy to follow, and other rules for the health of a long-lasting relationship.

What Is a Cuckold Foot Fetish?

A cuckold foot fetish is everything a cuckold fetish is, now with feet. It combines two of the most common fetishes into one erotic package. You still watch your partner have sex, but at the same time, you’re doing something with their feet.

This form of cuckolding leans into the humiliation aspect of the fetish. Basically, the cuckold is so submissive to their dominant partner that they’ll literally lick their feet during the act. Sometimes these scenarios go further and involve the cuckold ingesting the bull’s bodily fluids off of their partner’s feet.

Although this is certainly a part of someone’s actual sex life, it’s mostly popular in cuckold porn. You’ll see flick descriptions like “lowly cuck sucks hot wife’s toes while getting railed by huge cock.”

Here’s a general guide to cuckolding fetish terms. If you see another word next to “cuckold” or “cuckolding”, add that element to the same cuckolding dynamic. For example, in a cuckold bondage fetish, you can assume someone’s tied up. Maybe it’s the cuckold, tied to a chair, forced to watch their partner have sex. Or it’s their partner, tied to a bed while the bull pleasures them.

Guide To Cuckolding Fetish: How to Talk to Your Partner About Trying It

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We’ve taken you through different definitions and details of this taboo fetish. For the rest of this guide to cuckolding fetish, we’re covering how to bring this kink to your sex life. First up: how to talk to your partner about cuckolding.

We don’t recommend coming out of the gate swinging. Cuckolding isn’t this mainstream thing that everyone’s into. Nor does it have to be. Some people may love the idea, while others might feel upset, insecure, or jealous. Don’t assume how you’re partner will react. Instead, ease them into the discussion by asking them about their sexual fantasies.

Once you ask them, listen for keywords that could translate well to your own fetish. Say your partner mentioned they’re curious about threesomes, or aroused thinking about someone watching them have sex. This could be a great opening for you to talk about your cuckold dreams.

If your partner likes the idea, figure out what a good starting point would be for both of you. Make sure you both lay out all of your possible concerns, hard limits, and goals. Don’t brush feelings like jealousy under the rug. Get it all out in the open now, so it doesn’t bite you in the ass later.

If your partner doesn’t entertain your fetish, leave it there. Not everyone has the same sexual desires or level of comfort. Don’t try to force your kink on them. You can still have great sex and a fantastic relationship without indulging in your every fantasy. However, if cuckolding is a deal breaker for either of you, respect that.

Guide To Cuckolding Fetish: How To Do It

Congratulations! You struck relationships gold and found someone who’s into your deepest desires. Next in our guide to cuckolding fetish: how to try out cuckolding. As we mentioned previously, there are many different levels of cuckolding. Here’s a way to approach each.

  1. Keeping it a fantasy. Especially if this is your first time entering the wild world of cuckolding, start with storytelling. Ask your partner to tell you made-up or real-life sex scenarios involving them and someone else. Think of it as if they’re reading you a steamy romance novel. Except their, the main character, and you’re watching from the sidelines with glee.
  2. Solo sex missions. If you’re ready to take things to the next level, try sending your partner out for intimate encounters. As always, have a discussion about what interactions you’re both comfortable with and what is a no-go. Then, when your partner returns, have them tell you every steamy detail. Depending on how you both feel about control, you could even pick out the other person for them. Want to get closer to the action? Escort them to their rendezvous and wait outside. Imagining what’s going on might tantalize you to the top.
  3. The real deal. If you’re both prepared and comfortable, it’s time to cuckold in real life. Again, set guidelines and a safeword in case anyone catches a case of cold feet. Additionally, if you’re bringing in a third that you don’t know, keep safety top of mind. Meet in a neutral location and avoid giving out unnecessary personal information.

Guide To Cuckolding Fetish: Where To Find a Third

Last but not least on our guide to cuckolding fetish: where to find a third. Sadly, there isn’t such a thing as a fetish locator to instantly connect you with other lusting kinksters. However, there are two great options to consider:

  1. Fetish apps. Dating and hookup apps are the best way to get laid in the modern age. Why? They’re easy to download and let you look for raunchy romps on the go-. Many apps are also location-based, which makes it easy to find singles near you. Apps like FetLife are the ultimate playground for any kind of fetish or kink. You can also try an open relationship app like #open or Feeld to find the perfect cuckolding couple.
  2. Personal ad websites. Unlike traditional dating websites that focus on vanilla relationships, adult classifieds aren’t afraid of taboo fetishes. Using a Craigslist personals-style site is a great way to fly your freak flag while staying anonymous.

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